Forgiveness – 4/13 meeting

On Thursday April 13th, Miriam presented her most recent presentation entitled “ Forgiveness “ 

Miriam shared during her presentation, she would present how she feels about forgiveness.  Miriam shared one definition of forgiveness.

Forgiveness “ is giving up all hope for a better past” . I really like this definition.

So, who are some of those we may be angry with, and need or want to forgive?  Family, Parents, co-workers, kids, maybe even a total stranger. Those are some.

Miriam also shared that forgiveness can also be looked at as a conscious, deliberate feeling towards someone.  If you forgive someone, it’s not saying that what that person did is okay. 

If you’re holding anger or resentment against someone, it may make you feel like a prisoner with those feelings. If you learn to somehow forgive that other person, it’s like setting a prisoner free.  And that prisoner was you! 

Remember you get to decide when or how to forgive that other person. 

Some of the hardest people to forgive are those that are closest to us. The closer the person, the harder it will be to forgive. 

One huge benefit of forgiveness is that it can lower depression and anxiety levels. That’s a great benefit!  

There are also three different types of forgiveness;

1) exoneration…which is wiping the slate clean with that other person. This may be a situation where something someone did was purely by accident. 

2) forbearance…this is a middle ground. This may mean an apology from another, but mixed with blame. With this type of forgiveness, the other person might try and make you feel responsible for the situation. 

3) release…this is the most common type of forgiveness. This is when the person that hurt you, doesn’t realize that they hurt you. The other person may be truly sorry for what they did, and may ask forgiveness. An example of this type would be if a spouse were to cheat on you. 

With forgiveness, you get to choose when to put it down and leave it there. Forgiveness does not require you to continue that relationship, but it does allow you to release the bad feelings towards the other. 

Remember, don’t let that other person that hurt you, continue to live rent free in your mind. Instead of feeling powerless, forgive that other person and move forward. This release will give you freedom!

This can also be about forgiving yourself for bad choices you have made. Try and learn to understand your emotions. Why does it really bother you if you have made a bad decision?  Try and learn to accept responsibility for your choices.

Also remember, to treat yourself with compassion. And realize it’s okay to make mistakes. Try and learn ways to grow from your mistakes.

Remember forgiveness is a good thing, and it may finally be time to forgive that other person and put the burden down! 

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