DBSA Omaha New Hope

This last Thursday, Miriam shared her presentation entitled “ Holiday Blues”

She began by asking us what word comes to mind when we think of the upcoming holidays.

My word was comforting.  I have always enjoyed holidays.

However for many people, the holidays may bring loneliness, stress, anxiety, or depression.  But please remember that holiday blues are real and that they are normal.  It’s not a personal defect to experience stress, depression, or anxiety during the holiday season.

Holidays can be a real stressor, but try and embrace things that make them your own part of the holiday.

So, what can we do to make the season better?

1) try and simplify things.

2) take control of your holidays.

3) learn to smash unrealistic expectations.

And it’s okay to mourn the old times. But instead of trying to recreate the past, maybe learn to let it go.  And keep one or two traditions that don’t exhaust you. And make the holidays your own.  If you are having family or friends over for dinner, maybe make their favorite dish?

If you do all the cooking, have your guests pitch in and do the dishes.

The holidays may be a time when you need to set the boundaries.

If you set boundaries, stick to them!

And if you don’t have anyone to spend the holidays with, reach out and connect with others.

Maybe volunteer during the holidays at a nursing home.  Volunteering has been known to release dopamine!

Or find a community event to go to during the holidays.

Remember to stick to what you can and can’t do, and don’t overextend yourself.

Be sure to maintain your routine and habits, and have a plan to take care of yourself!

Last week we talked in analogies, this week we address the same topic, directly.  Once the situation is real, best to address head on.

Last week, hypothetical situation, this week is how does a friend handle another friend saying that they want to end their life.  It is about dancing in their darkness, finding out how serious they are, finding out if they have a plan, finding out if they have the means to carry out their plan, and then doing what any friend would do, helping them to get the help they actually need right now.

The purpose of this talk is that we want you to feel comfortable enough to trust us and ask for the help you need, no matter what your situation is.

Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, its about learning to  dance in the storm while being there for your friend, holding their hand and leading them through the next 15 minutes, and then the next hour, and then through the night and the storm clouds.

It is about taking their moment seriously and doing what is best for them right now.  It is about doing what is best for all the other people that heard them speak the words.

Who is next, suicide, unfortunately gives tacit permission & approval for others felling low.  Who will be triggered, who is next?  How far do these thought of death spread? And beyond that, how far does the wave of dark butterflies spread and Who does it affect.

I bring this up because it is an issue at odds with our group rule of “What is said here stays here”.  In the case of a group member expressing Suicidal or homicidal ideations, we are changing what help and support are going to look like as a group policy.  The intent is solely how can we help our friend the most right now.  We must take seriously when we feel there is a situation in our meeting discussions, where a person has expressed or described:

“A situation where a person is in imminent danger of harm to self or others”.

We will keep this situation confidential from anyone else in group, and will share only what information we need to if we need to get help.

So, over the past few months your board has been working on a new safety plan that ensures it being safe for anyone at our meetings to fully express their situation. It further ensures that anyone having these feelings will be treated as a friend in trouble, their wishes respected.

Some of you know me, some not, some of you were here last week. some were not.  So rather than go through a big chunk of last week’s presentation again, my brief history regarding suicide is 40 years ago I went through a 3 month period where I was actively suicidal.  I found my way out of the darkness so I have lived experience with this topic.  As well, my son, while in college, 1000 miles away had his own issues.  I have friends who should be sitting in this room right now but are not.  And I work at the Clarkston UNMC Psychiatric Emergency room, where I share my story with multiple people every week who experienced their own dark thought and made attempts less than 24 hours prior to our chat.  Fortunately, most of these people either had the strength to express their intentions to someone who took action, or were found mid attempt and saved.

So, going forward, “What is said here, stays here, until silence is not in the person’s best interest” will be part of our group rules. We cannot and should not ignore what is essentially a cry for help, and yet, our friend has trusted us with their intentions, and we cannot, as a friend, ignore those intentions.  When a life is on the line, “what is said here, stays here” is not in the best interest of anyone involved when active danger is expressed.  The key word here is active.  If you are talking about something you felt ten years ago, that is not active.  If you say “I feel like going home and taking all the pills in my house, then wandering in traffic”  that is active danger to yourself.

We want to still make it safe and comfortable for anyone to have the courage to express suicidal ideations at group, only now, what will happen is if suicidal or homicidal intentions are expressed, we will pause the meeting for a few moments as ask that attendee to meet the small group leader in the hallway.  The group leader and one of our peer support specialists will meet with the person expressing these thoughts in private.  The person expressing the ideations, the peer, and the second hour leader will discuss how best to meet the person’s needs and what is in their best self interest to protect them from immediate harm and plan out the rest of their night with the goal of them receiving a level of care that matches their level of emergency.

We are willing to listen to your entire story, you will be heard.  No matter how long it takes.  Every person is different and there are no one size fits all answers to this situation.  Stating that you are in trouble does not place a burden on us, it gives us an opportunity to help you.

What does hurt us as group leaders is if you withhold your true thoughts and we find out the next day you did something that we could have helped you through or prevented.

Our first question will always be:  When you said what you said, what did you hope would happen?

We want to focus on your wishes and apply our knowledge of the system to agree on what you want and need in that moment.

We promise to be 100% present. For the next hour, I know that our conversation can be the difference.  All social norms go out the window.  We will do what has to be done because your life could depend on it.

So, where does this approach come from?  Over the past year I have seen so many people follow all the rules and yet, end up in a place they never wanted, a place that made everything worse, a place that taught them to not seek help when suicidal.  A place that punishes those seeking help, rather than helping them.  I do not want that for my friends, so tonight I ask you simply to trust me.  Trust me and let my experiences and life help you.  Let me help you make the best decision you will ever make, to stay alive and get the care you need and deserve.  Your pain can not break me.  I can and will walk with you in your pain and see that you make it through your night.

Tonight we are going somewhere we do not usually go in this group. But every so often, we need to step out from behind boundaries and get very real, and that is what tonight is all about.  This is the sixth time I have given this presentation on the topic of suicide.  Each time, it is difficult.  It makes me revisit a place that I never want to see again.  But I do it.  I do it because each time I am told it helps.  Each time, someone tells me, it made the difference.  The most important difference.

It goes to the most vital purpose of this group, at least in my mind and heart.  I need to talk to you about this.  Time is finite.  My time is finite.  So tonight we stretch the boundaries of what we talk about in this group.  I speak tonight because if something bad happened to one of you, my friends, and I didn’t do all I could to stop it, well…..  Just know, your actions affect others, others that love and care about you.  And the affect it is not good, no matter what you think.

This is the fire.  It is always burning, always there.

From here, I am safe.  It can’t harm me.

I can get close to it, and I am still safe.

I can briefly almost get into it without it hurting me.

But I know it is dangerous.  Deadly dangerous.

Right now, the fire is small and contained.   But it still burns and if something goes wrong, it has the potential to burn everything down.  The potential to start a chain reaction that ends us.

Many of us have a fire.

Everyone’s is different.

For some, it is booze, others pills.

It can be a certain person, a certain experience, a certain thing, or even a certain place.

The place can be real or just in our minds.

Those are the most dangerous places.  That is my fire.

Simply said, the fire is the thing that can destroy us as it almost did me.

For some of us, our fires linger in the background for long periods of time, even years.  During a vulnerable time, it can spark up and cause great harm.

A small flame can start a much bigger problem.  Physically, emotionally, spiritually, our fires can end us.

We are afraid of our fire.  More than anything else in our lives.  Many of us have seen it up close, and we’re lucky to have escaped it.  Some of us have escaped that deepest, dark place once, some many more times than that.  If we had the power, we would banish it far far away, never to be mentioned, or thought of ever again.  That would be great.  That would be wellness.

but – as some of the bravest people in this room know – we do not always have that kind of willpower over our fire. when we are feeling weak, or in distress, because of negative core beliefs, our experiences, our illnesses, sometimes our fires get hold of us. when we are at our low points, it can be its strongest self. and usually at the absolutely worst time, the fire tries to gain control and uses that power

How do we stay safe?            How do we stay here?  Because that is what we all really want, a chance at a better tomorrow, that can only happen if tomorrow exists for all of us.

Well, that work starts now.

When we are strong.

When the fire is but the distant smell of smoke..

We must do our homework.

We must realize that even a little work now, can make all the difference later.

We must realize that our lives are a pile of dry kindling that we fit together and just removing or changing the balance that keeps us going is dangerous.

We must know the balance we have achieved is vital.

And that things like stopping our meds, changing our routine, going to places that have been bad for us in the past are moving our finely balanced dry sticks closer to the flame.

We must prepare for the day that the fire comes, because, for many of us, it will come again.

If I draw a ring around the fire and place that ring far enough away, I create a safe buffer zone.  Outside that zone, I barely feel its influence.  If I can manage to stay there, I will be OK.  The stronger I build that boundary, the safer I am, most of the time.

So in real life, what does that boundary look like?

Most of the time this is a statement like

“I am going to stay away from ______”

Another thing we must do today is to work on ourselves, because, in the end, at that dark moment of truth, it is up to each of us to save ourselves when faced with our raging fires.

To find the strength we need within ourselves requires time, patience, and practice.  The first time we do anything, it is a bit scary.  But if we do it, and succeed, we gain confidence, and sort of like when we lift weights, each time we do it, it gets a bit easier and we get a bit stronger.

Time, patience, practice, human connection, vulnerability, honesty, reaching out for help, reaching for our skills… The confidence and experience that comes with using our skills in times of strength… This is how we can keep our fires from ending us

We do not need to face our fire in order to develop the inner strength we need when the fire comes.

Most importantly, we do not need the ability to get ourselves all the way back to good.

We need just enough strength to get help in that very dark moment.  This is the moment where either the fire will win or you will.  This is the darkest depth.  The singular moment where we make the choice to listen to the seductive song of the fire, or to try to summon help.  To try to be found.

This is where practice comes in.  While they may seem small, trivial and unrelated, here are a few mental exercises you can do safely that will build your strength to face your fire.

1. Pick a day and focus on an important task.  Shut out all outside influences until you have finished.  Focus and train your brain to follow your commands.  As it must when the fire is burning down your house.
2. Pick a day and be nothing but positive.  No snarky comments, nothing negative.  Not even joking with friends.  Everything is a compliment, everything is positive.  It’s really hard for most of us! Especially me.
3. Take a day off from the internet.  No FB, no Instagram, no tick tock, no X.  Completely off the net.  Completely free from outside influences and ideas.  Allow you to be purely you.  Live the day in your own place and that very moment, free from the influence of the rest of the world.
4. Have a day of mindfulness.  A day for yourself and your soul.
5. For a day, actively question your actions.  “Why do I do this this way, why do I like this show, this food….”  You might be surprised at some of the answers.  We do a lot of things out of habit that perhaps if we think about it, are no longer fun, or no longer good for ourselves.
6. For a day, delay your responses.  Take a breath and think through your answer, rather than blurt it out.  Your real, thoughtful self might surprise you.
7. Focus an entire day on compassion and forgiveness.  Make this day about everyone except yourself. Show your caring side to others and let the past be in the past.
8. Go 24 hours without complaining about anything.  Just positivity in your thoughts.
9. Go 24 hours without using your dominate hand.  Get your brain out of autopilot.
10. Go 24 hours speaking only in questions.  No opinions, just listen to responses.
11. And most importantly, as homework tonight: Think about others.  Go down your list.  Mom, Dad, husband, wife, kids, sister, brother, friends, co workers, even your dog or cat.  Picture their lives without you in it.  Watch your life for the times you make a difference to someone.  My son Josh is still deeply effected by the loss of a close classmate in high school.  
12. Every time I walk into this building, I think of Bo.       Right now, my friend Howard is holding on because he has no one to care for his dog if he lets his fire consume him.  Do this when you are strong.  Think long and hard about the impact you have on others every day.  Think about how you would make them feel, how you would change their lives.  You are important, to the people around you, and the fire will lie to you, telling you, you are not. Do not believe it!                                      
13. By doing these exercises, you are building a defense for when all seems lost.  Write your list of people down.  Write what you think their lives would be like should your fire win. Do this now, so in that dark moment, you can read your rational self to the fire, and maybe, just maybe, that dark moment will see a glimpse of light. And that glimpse of light, can make all the difference.

Each of these exercises is all about strength and discipline.  Mind discipline.  None of them are going to change your life by themselves.  None of them are going to cure anything.  That is not the point.  But hopefully, by doing these things, you will develop just enough inner strength and focus, that when your fire flares up, you can focus long enough to call out for help.  To be found.  Train your brain to respond to your commands. Realize you do matter to others and they do care and would miss you when you’re gone.

It is all about training you brain to fight the fire. Getting the smallest sliver of control back from the fire.  Just enough to make that call for help. That is what you need, that makes all the difference.

Realize that all you need to do is to win that exact dark moment.  No matter what your fire is telling you, there is help.  Your one and only goal is to use that moment you have trained for to reach out to get it.

Finally, if you take only one thing away tonight it is this.

Have a Someone, and let your true, authentic self, complete with all it’s issues be known to that someone.

For those of you that know you have someone, hold tight to that.  Work that relationship.  Give them a code word.  Make sure that if you have to make that call, they will be there for you and that they understand what is at stake in that very moment.

If you are a someone for someone, never fail to answer when they reach out.  Never fail to put yourself in the background and give full focus to your friend.  Yes, get them the professional help they need right away, but know that you are the difference in that moment.  This is your 15 minutes to be strong for both of you. Especially until that help arrives.

For those of you that do not have a someone, your life at some point, may depend on finding one. There’s no room of people that understand isolation and loneliness better than this room does. But know this – you are deeply worthy of being seen and being known. It’s okay if getting back into the swing of human connection starts with a professional like a therapist or a peer. If you’re ready, challenge yourself to open up to a friend or family member or even someone sitting in this room. Open up and let yourself be known and loved, because of whatever the consequences of opening up, the consequences of not opening up could be so much worse

This last Thursday, Miriam shared with us her presentation on “ Grading our Lives”

Miriam began by asking us if we have ever graded our lives.  I guess I have never thought about it before.  She shared that she has been receiving a newsletter from author Mark Manson, who is known for his books on self help and personal growth.  In high school, Miriam shared she received mostly A’s in all of her classes, as that is what was expected of her.

But when we are struggling with anxiety in our lives, we might feel like we’re failing a test we didn’t even take.

But what is in between perfection and failure?  Maybe our failures are self invented.  We may conjure up these ideas of perfection, and then fail them.

We may exaggerate sometimes, but it’s good to remember that we are not a failure. 

So maybe we need to choose our own criticism.  After all, what are you afraid you are going to be criticized for? 

Our minds can be loud and chaotic sometimes, when we are dealing with our mental health challenges. 

Maybe our expectations are too rigid?   Let’s say that when you are driving, you take a wrong turn.  Does that mean you’re never going to drive again?

Maybe we need to be a little more flexible?  It’s been shown that flexible routines tend to out perform more rigid ones.

Why be more strict on ourselves when something doesn’t go our way.

What is the hardest thing right now, that you’re convinced you can’t handle?

Remember life doesn’t come with an inherent playbook. 

We have to work on creating our own meaning, as we do make our own purpose in life.

Remember no one is keeping score on you and what you do.

If you’re sitting around waiting for life to show up, don’t wait.

Just do what you want to do!  

On Thursday September 10, I shared my presentation on “ Things you can do When you Feel Yourself Slipping “

     So, have you ever had a time in your life when all of a sudden you are not feeling at your peak mentally? I think we have all been there before. 

 When we are feeling more than a little depressed or anxious, that could be a sign we are slipping into a depression. Besides seeking help from our doctor, which of course is important, there are many coping ideas we can use to manage our symptoms. 

     Our coping skills may keep us from having a relapse. When we feel like we might be slipping back into a depression, we need to reach out to a family member or friend just to let them know how we are feeling. Depression will sometimes make us want to reduce our social life, which can make the symptoms of depression worse. So, if you have a friend or family member you can confide in, that will make a big difference. Always important is continuing the practice of self-care. There are many different things we can do to take care of ourselves that will help us improve our mental health, especially when we might feel a relapse coming. 

Get regular exercise…..walking outside, stretching, running, doing yoga, or working out at the gym are all great examples. My go to self care when I am having a tough time is to go for a walk. Walking helps me clear my mind of all of the negative thoughts. And often times when I am on my walk I will receive a friendly hello here and there from others along the way. Sometimes just the small act of exchanging pleasantries with someone might be exactly what you need to start your day out right. 

Stick to a regular sleep schedule….try to go to bed and wake up at the same time each day. 

Try using a light therapy lamp….UV light lamps help to mimic sunlight, and are helpful especially if you have seasonal depression, or live somewhere where there’s not much light in the Winter.

 Take a vitamin D supplement…similar to the UV lamp, vitamin D can help to alleviate depression related to lack of sunlight. 

Maintaining a routine…..Make sure you are taking care of basic hygiene so you feel like you are in a routine, such as showering ( yes even if you are working from home) getting dressed every day, and brushing your teeth.

Track your Mood …..

When we have dealt with depression in the past, we should try to become aware of our moods and how they may change each day. One way to do this is by using a mood tracker. 

Sometimes mood trackers will allow us to rate our mood from 1 to 10, or add details on what is happening that day. 

So, I have actually tried this for the few couple of weeks, and it was very fascinating to me. I made it simple and kept a tally in a notebook. Next to the date/day of the week I wrote down a number from 1-10 that best described my mood for the day. I usually waited to give myself a score until later in the day. My average number each day was an 8.  Not bad, huh? 

Gratitude… Another way to keep away depression and anxiety, is to start being more grateful. When you are grateful and feeling good with how things currently are, your physical health may reflect that. You’re more likely to exercise and eat better, taking care of your health.

The best way to make gratitude a habit is by not waiting for special moments.

Be thankful for the warm cup of coffee or tea you are enjoying. 

 Be grateful and appreciate the roof you have over your head, and for the food on your plate. 

 Be appreciative of the customer in line at the grocery store who let you go ahead of them. 

Take a moment to be grateful when a best friend or your Mother texted you to see how you’re feeling. 

 Do gratitude exercises … Take a walk and be thankful for each thing you see: trees, flowers, the sky, the birds. 

Call someone who did something kind and tell them how much you appreciate them. Write a letter to someone to express appreciation for something they did for you. 

I find that when I am grateful to others and actually take the time to say thank you to someone, it makes me feel better and often times it will cause me to forget what I may have been so anxious about.

On Thursday August 13, Kristina shared with us her presentation on “ Courage”

First of all, what a great choice for a topic!   Kristina shared that she had been struggling a bit lately, and one of the things that keeps her going is her courage.

She shared that there are actually six different types of courage.  I was surprised to find out there were that many types!  

Below are the different types:

1).  Physical courage…to keep going with resiliency, balance and awareness.

2)  Social courage…to be yourself unapologetically, without worrying about what others think.

3).   Moral courage…doing the right thing even when it’s uncomfortable or unpopular.

4). Emotional courage…feeling all your emotions ( positive or negative) without guilt or attachment.

5).  Intellectual courage…To learn, unlearn and relearn with an open and flexible mind.

6). Spiritual courage…Living with purpose and meaning through a heart centered approach towards all life and oneself. 

This last Thursday, our friend Carolyn shared with us her latest presentation entitled “ In One Ear and Out the Other”

Carolyn started by sharing her rendition while playing the guitar of “ You Raise me Up”

She spoke about how it takes courage to present in front of our group.  But, we are all trying to better ourselves by attending DBSA.  That is why we show up! 

When making decisions in your life, try not to let your ego take over.

It can take courage to go solo in life. Sometimes when you are changing course, it may cost you a job or position.  Sometimes you may need to re-think before you make a change, or possibly try a different strategy.

And you can always try taking the road less traveled.  I like this idea! 

And maybe ask yourself where do you want to go in life?

When we meet new people, sometimes we may judge them without having all of the facts.  How about we give the new kid on the block a warm welcome?

So maybe stop and think, what is your driving force in life?  What keeps you going?  What do you spend your time thinking about?  Do you have an idea that keeps you excited?

Carolyn shared with us a question that made all of us stop and think.

Growing up, did your parents want you to be a good person, or just be happy?

I have thought about this, and for me if I had to choose one, it would for me to be a good person.  However I bet if I were to ask my Mom, she would agree that both are equally important! 

Love that question Carolyn!  

This last Thursday, Don shared with us his presentation on “ The Fine Art of Quitting Without Giving Up”

Every once in a while, we all may run across a time in our lives when we need to quit something to make a change.  

But we don’t always know which path is better.   Once you start a new journey, such as taking a new med for example.  You make question yourself if the new med is right or wrong for you?  Or is there a bear in your path preventing you from moving on?  

It’s usually about what works for us and what doesn’t.  And we don’t know what we don’t know until we had down a new path.  

If you’re working in a job where you have been for many years, if you’re not feeling fulfilled from day to day you may feel like quitting that job.

But everyone keeps on telling you don’t quit, just keep pushing through.

But remember great things rarely happen without a struggle. 

However if your commitment is attached to the right mission, it will give you some momentum.

We may seek healing, but sometimes we refuse to release our obsession with familiar things.

You might become efficient at something, but that job may actually drain you.

You may grow tired of doing the same thing every day.

But progress isn’t always about adding more effort. 

A little addition by subtraction may help when you’re considering a career change. 

Sometimes you may need to remove what no longer fits.  And add something that is more aligned with your goals.  What matters is not your failures, but what that journey taught you. 

The pain that you may have felt was necessary.  Remember your time and energy are valuable!  You can quit part of your plan but don’t quit the journey.

Keep believing in yourself even if progress is slow.

Below are three signs that it may be time to let go of your current job. 

Watch for these signals, especially after you’ve genuinely tried to improve the situation.

1. Chronic Drain

Every meaningful pursuit takes effort. Everybody experiences difficult seasons.

But there’s a difference between something challenging you and something continually depleting you.

You’ve adjusted your approach. Set boundaries. Asked for help. Made changes.

And still, it leaves you drained before it begins, drained while you’re doing it, and drained long after it’s over. 

2. Pride Erosion

Ask yourself: 
Do I respect the person I’m becoming?

Does this thing add to the authentic self I am building?

Not whether other people approve.

Not whether it looks successful from the outside.

Do you feel proud of what you are doing?  

You, not your friends, not the people on facebook, all that matters is what is inside you.

Sometimes we stay committed to things because they’re working, even after they’ve stopped feeling meaningful. This is sort of like treading water.  You are just trying to keep your head above the surface until you can find the next thing to swim toward.

Success without fulfillment can become its own trap. 

3. You’ve Outgrown the Season

Something can be exactly right for one chapter of your life and completely wrong for the next.

The goals you had five years ago, or even five weeks ago, aren’t necessarily the goals you have today.  You must keep checking in with yourself and making course corrections.

The identity that got you here isn’t always the identity that will get you where you’re going.

Growth requires us to release what we’ve outgrown.

We don’t quit a job when it’s difficult, but maybe when it doesn’t fit the person we are becoming.  But remember to leave your job with integrity.  Know what you’re saying yes to before making that commitment to the new job.

Move from having to endure everything to choosing what matters.

Do not be afraid of throwing away what no longer fits.  Quit what no longer matters. 

This last Thursday, I shared with our group some helpful hints on keeping up on our self-care.  

After my recent vacation with our my small group, I realized more than ever how much we all need structure and routine in our daily lives.

And of the importance of self-care in our daily routine.

Even though I was traveling with a small group of nine, we all know how it can be to deal with that many different personalities.  

When planning our cruise, we had pre-planned many tours/ shore excursions each day. However due to the recent heatwave, a few of us ended up canceling some of our tours and spending more time on the ship.

At night I joined everyone for dinner, which usually included my Cousin and his wife who were also on the cruise.  Well I discovered on my cruise that my cousin drinks a lot. 

My cousin knew well before the cruise that I didn’t drink any longer, due to the medication I take for my mental health. We all know that alcohol and psych meds don’t mix, right? Well, during our dinners together, he was constantly pushing me to drink, while at the same time challenging my boundaries.

Well it did get me to thinking about our boundaries, and how so very important they are to our mental health. There were some important things I learned while traveling;

1) Be very flexible. Even though you may plan your trip months in advance, as we did. Plans can definitely change at the very last minute. And they do. Others on your trip may get sick, or maybe even get into disagreements while traveling. Or the weather may become a factor as it did for us. 

 2) Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries!!!  I can’t stress enough how important boundaries are for us each and every day. If there’s something that you really don’t want to do, just say so. Make sure and communicate that with your other traveling companions. But also make sure and engage with others in your group, and try not to isolate too much. Remember that you are on vacation! 

 3). Routine…..Try and maintain some sort of routine on your vacation. Structure and lack thereof can become an issue on your vacation if you let it. Do try new things while vacationing, even if it means pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. The dilemma we sometimes face is that there are definitely times when we want to regroup and be by ourselves for a little while. That is fine, but try and do so in moderation. It’s a pretty tough balancing act isn’t it? 

 4) When you’re on vacation, it’s always fun to try new foods. But try and do so without overdoing it. If you’re anything like me, sometimes all of the rich foods really start to catch up with you! 

And some other self-care tips that are always important:

Try and get regular exercise. 

Get plenty of sleep ( this one is probably the most important) 

Drink plenty of water each day.

Use your coping skills to deal with stress.

On Thursday July 23rd, our friend Corey shared with us his presentation on “ Hope”

Corey spoke to us about hope in our lives and on how it should be an important part of our recovery.

Corey shared that back in 2016 he started experiencing lots of anxiety and depression.  He stated that hope is super important, but he continues to have a love/hate relationship with it. 

He also shared that there can be two different types of hope.  There is passive hope, where you are looking at things more passively.  Such as wishful thinking, or having a positive outlook. 

There is also active hope, which is where we become more active and participate more in bringing about what we’re hoping for.  Hope can be something you work towards achieving.  Active Hope can be something we do rather than have.   Such as maybe gardening or exercising.

Corey went around the room asking for volunteers to share what it is they were hoping for.  I shared that I was hoping to retire from my job of many years.  And after a few of us shared what our hopes were, he went around the room a second time and asked those same people to share what steps they had taken to achieve their goal.  I shared that the very same day of this meeting, I had finally given my retirement notice at work.  There had been a lot of planning for me up until that point, but nonetheless I gave my notice that day.

Corey closed his presentation by sharing that both resilience and Hope are very important in your mental health recovery.