DBSA Omaha New Hope

Most of us have a fire. The thing we fear the most. The most dangerous thing in our life. Thursday night we talked about our fires, how to prepare for when they rage, and the most important thing to do to prepare.

Facilitator Don took us on a journey unlike our normal meetings. Starting off with a dedication to those no longer with us, through music and stories, we talked about our personal fires. We talked about the need to practice focusing your mind so when the moment comes, you can reach out for help. The need to have someone in your life that you can trust. Someone that will unfailingly be there for you. Someone who understands you and what is at stake in that moment.

For some of us, we continued the theme into the second hour, allowing those amongst us that needed to, to tell their stories of dealing with and surviving their fires.

On Thursday November 4th, our DBSA meeting began with Facilitator Steve giving a presentation on“ Dealing with Family and Friends “. 
Steve started out his talk by advising when we are feeling depressed or anxious, unsupportive friends and or family can be challenging. He went on to mention that if friends and or family are unsupportive, and possibly blame you for your illness or maybe even by making thoughtless statements, that can be discouraging.First, and most importantly, recognize not everyone will understand. There may be a reason for their feelings that has nothing to do with you. Their thought process might be from growing up in an environment where they learned it was wrong to show vulnerability. It very well may be possible that the reason they are unable to support you is that they are dealing with their own mental health issues. Steve advised sometimes the best way to feel better is to help someone else!It takes the focus off of you! And learn to treat yourself well!  Possibly one of the best ways to find the support you need is to start with yourself. Learn to be your own cheerleader!Practice being kind to yourself, and keep the self-talk positive.Steve mentioned if you realize friends and family aren’t giving you the support you may need, consider joining a support group, such as DBSA or NAMI. At first it may seem a little intimidating to open up when attending these groups, but you may discover that others who have a common struggle or experience may be great support.A few things to remember if you are dealing with unsupportive people:Not everyone is going to like you, which has nothing to do with you!Your job is not to please everyone, or to be understood by everyone.You must live your life for yourself, and not for other people!The most important thing I learned from this presentation, is to learn to trust your intuition, and to never second guess yourself.And try to stay true to what you know is real. If needed, write it down and come back to it whenever you feel uncertain.And above all, learn to forgive others. If you can learn the importance of forgiveness, you will free yourself!

Our most recent DBSA meeting started out with a most contemplative presentation, made by our facilitator Don.  Entitled “ The Masks that we Wear”, a most appropriate topic for the upcoming Halloween season. We learned from Don that one of the origins of Halloween is an ancient Celtic holiday, which began with the wearing of masks as protection from evil spirits.     

The more conventional definition of a mask is : a covering used to protect ourselves, but we also explored the mask as a false front.

There are different types of masks we wear:

1) an identity mask may be used to hide who you really are.

2) an emotional mask to hide what you are feeling

3) a situational mask to help you fit into a given situation.

There are commonalities between these masks.  All are good in small doses, but overdoing them can lead to unintended consequences. They all have a function, and can help protect you against ill natured people. Also wearing a mask can be a way of setting boundaries. 

There are practical reasons to shed a mask. By shedding your mask, you may live more to your potential. It may be a relief to shed a mask. To fully heal, one must shed the mask you are wearing. When you are wearing a mask, we aren’t always being your authentic self.

Be sure and join us on Thursday October 28th, when facilitator Becki will be presenting the topic “Fear” 

Every few years, we like to get feedback from the group. Well, that time is here again. Please take our less than 5 minute, 7 question survey.

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/KRBNMRM

This is your chance to tell us how we are doing and if we are meeting your needs. We want to hear from you!

Our most recent DBSA meeting got off to a strong start, with facilitator Miriam making an anticipated presentation entitled “ Things Mentally Strong People Don’t do, Part III” . During this evening’s edition of “ Things Mentally Strong People Don’t do”, Miriam focused on strategies we can use to help us to make desired changes and to meet our goals. 

She advised we should identify small steps we can take to meet our goals. She reminded us mentally strong people don’t expect immediate results, and also don’t give up after their first failure.  If you don’t see immediate results in meeting your goals, you may conclude it’s not working. However you must be patient, and not underestimate the time it will take to achieve your goal. 

Also try not to overestimate your abilities, and decide to commit to the long haul for the changes you desire.  Don’t place a time limit on changes you desire, or overestimate how much better things will be in your life with these desired changes. Recognize that progress may not always be recognizable in the very beginning. To succeed you should learn to pace yourself, and make sure to try and create realistic expectations for your goals.  Make sure you have a plan in place, pace yourself for the long haul and keep looking ahead to the end game! 

Please join us next Thursday October 14th, when we will have a craft night and we will be painting Halloween pumpkins! 

With a sizable crowd attending our most recent DBSA meeting, facilitator Miriam made a fascinating presentation entitled “ Things Mentally Strong People Don’t do, Part II “. 

During this evening’s presentation, she focused on things that we can and cannot control. What I found most fascinating was when Miriam spoke of our “ locus of control “.   We discovered a locus of control can be either internal or external.  It’s a belief about whether our actions are dependent on what we do, ( internal control) or on events outside of our personal control ( external control).  People seem to have either an internal or external control mindset, with a middle ground somewhere between the two being the desired place to reside. She advised it’s important to develop a balanced sense of control. 

Miriam advised to identify the things or problems we can control in our lives, and to let go of things we can’t control. If you do so, you’ll have more time for the things you can control. Also trying for complete control can lead to more anxiety. Sometimes giving up control can make you a stronger person. Learn to have more balanced thoughts, and begin practicing more acceptance. If you start to give up a little control, you may actually stop stressing out so much, and feel less stressed, which is a great feeling to have! 

Please join us next Thursday October 7th, when Miriam will be presenting “ Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, Part III” 

With a near capacity crowd attending our most recent DBSA meeting, we were treated to facilitator Don’s newest presentation. Entitled “ The Voices” Don went on to describe voices we sometimes have in our head, representing good and bad ideas. He advised that it’s sort of spooky to have inner voices talking to you, but most of us have them, at one time or another. 

Don presented a fun fact for the evening; asking us, did you know that 95% of our brain activity happens at an unconscious level?  And only 5% of our cognitive behavior comes from our conscious mind. Yet another important reason for us to make sure we are getting our rest each and every night. Don also talked about getting rid of negative self-talk. Negative self-talk can be that voice inside our head, our inner critic that seems to always want to convince us how “bad” we are. He encouraged us to get up off the couch and do something. If you are having trouble getting motivated to clean the house, you can start by setting a timer for 20 minutes. You may find that the chore you thought would take forever , won’t take long at all! 

Don advised once we have quieted the inner negative self-talk, to focus on the good stuff that our inner voices are telling us. He mentioned a few ways we can listen to our good inner voice. Most importantly he advised we should first find some quiet time to listen better to our good inner voice.  We can do that by turning off the phone and shutting off the tv.  We could also meditate, exercise, do yoga or even take a hike or walk somewhere. Whatever works for us, that will help to slow down our mind, and live more in the moment.  This will allow your good inner voice time to shine.

It was a very fascinating and thoughtful presentation from Don tonight. Please make sure and join us next Thursday September 30th, when Miriam will be presenting “ Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do – Pt. 2”

Our most recent DBSA meeting was very memorable, with Don presenting the evening’s topic “ Managing Change “.  After brief introductions were made from around the room, Don went on to dive deep into managing change, and how greatly change does affect our daily lives. Don described our daily experience as living in a “ simmering cauldron of change” . I liked that description!

We all realize that most changes are out of our control, especially when it comes to external changes. For example, with the recent experience we all had with Covid over the last year and a half, our daily schedules had changed dramatically.  We can however control how we react to change.

Don recommend that we flip the script, on how we handle change. He mentioned we should re-focus, reflect, and also focus on our self-care. Don suggested that when change happens, it’s time to set some boundaries, and control your reactions and learn to accept change all around us. It’s important to realize not every change affects you, and to work the problems that are important to you. 

Don advised in regards to change #1) think it over before reacting #2) acknowledge feelings #3) take a breath #4) take actions when you can and #5) let it go!

Very informative and always interesting presentation from Don this evening. Be sure and join us next Thursday September 16th, when Steve will be presenting. “. Things to do When you Feel Yourself Slipping “ 

Our most recent DBSA meeting was quite fascinating, with Miriam presenting our topic of the evening “ Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, part I “

After brief introductions were made by our rather substantial gathering, Miriam went on to describe many things that Mentally strong people don’t do. Included among the list, Mentally strong people don’t resist change, and they don’t worry about pleasing others.  They are not afraid to take risks, and also don’t procrastinate. They don’t resent other people’s successes, and most importantly they don’t fear alone time.

One of the most important thoughts I took away from the discussion, is mentally strong people don’t give away their power.  Some ways you may give away your power, are by avoiding confrontation, holding grudges, or even letting others determine your self worth. It’s important not to become a victim of your own circumstances.     

In order to take your power back, you need to identify who is taking your power, and ask yourself is there any validity to their complaints?  If there is, ask yourself if you want to change your behavior?  One of the most important benefits of taking back your power is that it will reduce your anxiety and depression!  Couldn’t ask for anything better! 

Miriam will be presenting a Part II on this topic sometime soon.  I can’t wait to learn even more about things mentally strong people don’t do! Please be sure to join us next Thursday September 9th, when Don will be presenting the evening’s topic:  “ Managing Change “